21 March 2014

Meaning of Life

This uniqueness and singleness which distinguishes each individual and gives a meaning to his existence has a bearing on creative work as much as it does on human love. When the impossibility of replacing a person is realized, it allows the responsibility which a man has for his existence and its continuance to appear in all its magnitude. A man who becomes conscious of the responsibility he bears toward a human being who affectionately waits for him, or to an unfinished work, will never be able to throw away his life. He knows the "why" for his existence, and will be able to bear almost any "how." - Viktor Frankl, a prominent Jewish psychiatrist and neurologist in Vienna who was arrested and transported to a Nazi concentration camp with his wife and parents in 1942.

Dr. Frankl survived the Holocaust even though his wife and parents did not. I don't know much about his life other than the little information that I've shared, but to me he seems like a great man.

It's interesting to feel and to see the mix of emotions that occur after hearing about someone whom we find inspiring. We look up to that person with a reverence and can put them on a pedestal of greatness. We can either then want to mimic what that person has done in our own lives, or think to ourselves that we will never be able to live up to that caliber of a life.

What's interesting to me is that almost no influential person sets out to be that way.  They just keep on keeping on in a way that works for them at that moment. I've always wondered if the "greats" have ever had a moment where they feel that they are "great".  Or would that defeat their influence?  Would that increase their influence?

I have always wished that my life was like a movie, where there is this omniscient view, well there is, but one where I could occasionally take that view point.  It would be quite helpful the times I lose my keys, or forget to do something important.  But what if we could occasionally take this omniscient view to see how our lives influence other people.  Would that increase our influence, or would that mar us from reaching our full potential.

I have been thinking about this recently after some news of people I used to know passing away.  Do you think they knew their influence on other people's lives before their life was cut too short?  I would like to think that we all know at least some of the influence that they have on other people's lives.

But just for a minute, think about all of the amazing people who were once in your lives, but for one reason or another, their role had been diminished or extinct.  Every once in a while, I think about these people and their impact they have had on my life.  Is there someone out there that thinks of me like that?  If we were aware that was happening would we change to keep them a part of our lives?

More importantly, would knowing that make our further interactions any less sincere? 

I don't have the answers to all of these posed questions, and I have strayed down a rabbit hole from the original quote.

Do you know why you are alive?  Have you found you passion?

Personally, I still don't believe that I have found my passion.  I have had brief visions, if you will, about what it may look like, but I don't have a clear view as to what my life's work will be.  Does that mean that if I was in Dr. Frankl's position that I would have a harder chance to survive until the end of WWII?  Definitely.  Does that mean that I wouldn't survive?  Definitely not.

I urge all of you who are reading this, to find your passion.  Make it a priority, make it the top of your to do list, whatever it takes.  This is important, you life may very well depend on it.  While I hope there will never be another atrocity like WWII that would test you as such, sometimes, your passion or your journey to discover your passion, can make your life feel worth it.

17 September 2013

Old Married Woman

I see that the title got your attention!

I am officially a married woman now.  I feel like I should look older or look like a typical "married young 20-something,"  meaning that I always look put together and give off an air that I know what I'm doing.  But I don't.  Nothing has changed.  I don't suddenly wear pearls, heals, and cute outfits.  I don't put my hair up in cool ways and cook amazing dinners for my husband (haha husband... that's still funny and new for me to say!).  I mean, yes, I am a good cook, if I do say so myself, but I do still occasionally resort to pasta.  And you know what, that's fine.  I don't have to be the perfect wife.  I think I'm pretty good at it, but I know that I'm not perfect.  I still fight with Pritish and get irritated over the little things.  However, I do find myself wanting to organize more.  But I think there's a reason for that.

After we got married, Pritish's parents spent five weeks with us, and his brother's family a week with us.  It was a lot of family, but I really enjoyed it.  Actually, I would recommend any newlywed couple to live with one side of the family for a little bit, even a week.  You know why?  We couldn't fight.   We couldn't get unnecessarily mad at each other and act like little kids about it.  We had to grow up and act like adults.  And you know what?  I think it helped.  Even after his family went back to India, we've been better about our irritations.  Now I don't want to jinx anything, but I do think that we have formed the beginning of good habits in the way we communicate.  Who would have thought?!  Haha  I do think that it was good for us as a couple.  Plus we got to spend five weeks together; something that we won't have many opportunities to do right away.

After his parents left, I got this insatiable itch to organize the house.  Now, if you know me, that normally happens about once a month, and it's normally something that i can put on the back burner.  But remember, we just got married and his parents just left, and I normally can't sit still for more than five minutes.  I don't have any project to do.  Nothing outstanding to complete, and no new project in the immediate foreseeable future.  Now, I probably should take some time and enjoy being married to my best friend.  I should learn to slow down a bit.  Even if it's not that much, I should.

I am learning to balance so much right now.  And I am starting to form good habits.  I am running a lot more, and that makes me in a much better mindset to work and to live.  I am learning when to say "Sorry, I need a run."  I run for a break.  I run for mental stability.  I run for the freedom to choose my habits and my schedule.  I run for me.